There are words in the English language that are overused. One of them is “awesome.” A standard rule is that the younger you are, the more you utter the word, “awesome,” because it’s just so awesome to say awesome.

Another word used excessively is, “best.” He’s the “best.” She’s the “best.” They’re the “best.” It’s so awesome it’s the best.

When I was News Director at WTMJ Radio, one of my program directors, a good guy by the name of Steve Wexler used to preach that when we were on the air discussing/promoting/teasing upcoming stories or talk show topics, we’d better be able to deliver what we were promising.

“COMING UP ON NEWSRADIO 620 WTMJ, THE GREATEST ACT OF KINDNESS IN THE HISTORY OF MANKIND. WTMJ NEWSTIME….7:33.”

That is NOT what Wexler had in mind.

Hyperbole often occurs in the subjective culinary world. Culinary no-no #63 was a perfect example. No, that burger didn’t change my life.

There is, I don’t want to say danger because that would be an exaggeration, but a definite risk when so-called food experts take on the challenge of selecting the “best” (there’s that word again) of a particular category.  The Food Network just broadcast a special called, “Top American Restaurants: Bon Appétit Picks the Best.” Food Network presents Bon Appétit magazine's best picks for American eats.

Can’t you just smell trouble brewing? Do you envision chefs tossing aprons at their TV sets? Would you like to be in charge of reading the Food Network’s e-mails?

Bon Appetit’s “experts” chose America’s “Best” Restaurants for steaks, burgers, ribs, tacos, fried chicken, and …….pizza. This edition of Culinary no-no will focus on the magazine’s choice for the best pizza place in America. Remember, this is the better than anybody else, numero uno.

Take a guess where this primo pizza palace is located.

One immediate guess would have to be that deep dish variety from the Windy City.








If you pick Chicago, that leads to an all-out shouting match with aficionados of the New York style pie.

So what city did Bon Appétit Magazine choose as having the best restaurant for pizza?

It would have to be Chicago…….or New York, right?

No no.

Try…..

Phoenix.

As in…

Arizona.

Bon Appétit Magazine selected Pizzeria Bianco as the restaurant with the best pizza in America.

Dream Dance could very well be the best restaurant in Milwaukee. It recently re-opened in a new location at the Potawatomi Bingo Casino with changes that make this stellar dining spot even better.

There was nothing wrong with the “old” Dream Dance per se. It boasted exceptional food and service. But it didn’t have convenient parking. Once outside of your car and inside the casino, to get to the restaurant, you had to maneuver your way through the labyrinth of bells and flashing lights and smoke and yes, some of the great unwashed. There were no restrooms in Dream Dance. Milwaukee Journal Sentinel dining critic Carol Deptolla in her review today says things have changed:

“And the physical changes at the restaurant, part of a $240 million expansion at the casino, are a vast improvement over the restaurant's previous home.

Longtime patrons will recall scurrying through the flashing, ringing, smoky maze to get to Dream Dance upstairs. Once inside, they found a fine restaurant, albeit windowless. If they needed a restroom, back into the casino they went.

The restaurant is on the first floor now, easily accessible from the outside (if not particularly well-marked on the exterior). Just leave your car with the valet at the main driveway or park in the ramp and head for the far eastern end of the complex. Giant doors in the lobby lead to the restaurant, sealed off from the din of the casino like an inner sanctum……. Restrooms are just down a short hall - inside the restaurant.”

Fine, but how’s the food?

Deptolla was impressed.

Apparently that $14.95 fish fry at Serb Hall didn’t go over too well.

Today, American Serb Hall is advertising its Friday Fish Fry in the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel………for $8.95.

But you won’t get cod or haddock for your $8.95. Instead, you’ll be served Alaskan Pollack.

Still beats $14.95.

Here we go again.

As reported in May, certain restaurants in New York City must now, under a new law, post the number of calories for each item on their menu boards or face fines. Now, an entire state may impose the same requirement.

A bill approved by the California Legislature awaiting the signature of Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger would make the west Coast the state the first in the nation to require restaurants to display the calorie counts for each item on their menus and menu boards. The law would apply to chain restaurants that have 15 or more outlets. About 17,000 restaurants would be affected by the law that would take effect in 2011. Supporters believe restaurant patrons will make healthier choices if presented the calorie information.

A new study indicates 3 out of 5 Californians are either overweight or obese. Researchers from  the Dr. Robert C. and Veronica Atkins Center for Weight and Health at UC Berkeley figure a menu-labeling law  will result in people losing weight. They calculate the weight loss after the law’s been in effect for a year would be about 2.7 pounds for adult fast-food customers.

The problem is that there is no way of knowing if people will reduce their intake of fattening menu items and exactly what their weight loss, if any would be. Supporters of the California legislation say the calorie counts in New York City are having a dramatic impact. But that evidence is primarily anecdotal. There’s no definitive study that clearly shows consumers armed with calorie counts makes them thinner. To get the data, a study would have to be done to find out what transpires after the law has actually been in effect for some time.

The American Journal of Public Health looked at 11 chains in New York City giving customers calorie counts. Subway was determined to have the most-easily seen information, making it handy for customers before they placed orders. Only 32% of Subway's customers said they saw the numbers, and of those, only 37% admitted the information affected what they purchased, or 12% of all Subway customers. Researchers determined the difference in calories between customers who saw the numbers and those that didn’t. Subway customers that saw the calorie counts ordered meals on average that had 52 less calories, a 7% reduction.

That tells me a menu-labeling requirement doesn’t work. Most customers aren’t seeing the information, not to mention the fact that a weight loss in a year of 2.7 pounds isn’t, I’m sorry, all that much. Some studies suggest only 15-20% actually pay attention to labels.

California’s restaurant industry prefers legislation proposed by Assembly member Nicole Parra (D-Hanford). It differs from the bill that calls for calorie counts on menus and menu boards by requiring the same information, but allowing restaurants to display it in several ways: menu or other writing at the point of sale, standard food item packaging, counter or table tent, tray liner, poster, brochure or other printed material, and/or electronic kiosk. The information must be available on the premises of the restaurant.

Will Governor Schwarzenegger sign the bill? Sure looks like it. Recently he signed a bill into law making California the first state to ban trans fats in restaurants.

Restaurant-goers are smart enough, I believe, to be able to discern if a menu item is loaded with calories. Government mandating that restaurants give this information, that will only increase their costs, and will probably not have a significant impact on eating habits, is just plain wrong.

This week, no one large culinary no-no entrée to chew on. Instead, a few smaller appetizer-like items to sample.

Let’s begin with Culinary no-no # 70, a famous cartoon character and his exploits around the pool.

 

The well known Frosted Flakes from Kellogg’s is one of the many sugar-sweetened cereals on the market. Come mid-September, look for someone other than Tony the Tiger to grace those cereal boxes: Olympic champion Michael Phelps.

In choosing Frosted Flakes, Phelps rejected the cereal most athletic phenoms opt for, the Breakfast of Champions, Wheaties. So-called health experts are furious because this will send a horrible message at a time when child obesity is sweeping Fatso, USA.

Seems to me lazy kids and irresponsible parents are more to blame for out of shape youngsters than Tony the Tiger.

Michael Phelps on boxes of Frosted Flakes? So what!

By the way, take a look at what Frosted Flakes is sponsoring.



Culinary no-no # 71

After a long run on the Food Network, celebrity chef Emeril Lagasse has landed on the environment –conscious cable channel, Planet Earth. Those familiar with Emeril, and that would be millions, know about his cooking flair, his dramatic excess. The chef calls it “turning it up a notch,” and finishes off each creation with a resounding, BAM! 

Alessandra Stanley writes about television for the New York Times. With schnozzola scraping the ceiling, Stanley critiques Emeril’s latest cooking show, slamming him for not being “green” enough:

Back in April, Culinary no-no # 52 examined how the biofuels craze and the subsequent rise in food prices was impacting world hunger.

Dirt cookies made out of mud. Looting.  Rioting.

And it’s getting worse.

Poor women in many parts of the world are trading sex for food, increasing the risk of new AIDS infections. Officials of the United Nations (UN) made that startling announcement at a conference in Mexico last week.

The UN points the finger at biofuels, claiming more expensive food prices have resulted in another 50 million people going hungry. Women are so desperate they’re joining the crews of large fishing boats, selling their bodies for scraps. Officials fear an explosion in new AIDS cases. Those on the front lines grapple with how to combat hunger and AIDS.

Read more from ABC.

As the mountain of evidence suggesting links to biofuels, higher food prices, and a global food crisis continues to grow, a correlation that most Americans fully understand, we can count on our government bureaucrats to turn a deaf ear to this critical issue.

Last week, the Environmental Protection Association refused to reduce the quota on ethanol in cars. The New York Times described the EPA’s conclusion that, “at least for now,  the national goal of reducing oil use trumps any effect on food prices from making fuel from corn.”

The newspaper quoted a typical bureaucrat, completely bankrupt of nay common sense. EPA administrator Stephen L. Johnson demonstrated his head-in-the -sand mentality when he said the ethanol mandate was not causing “severe harm to the economy or the environment.”

What planet is he on?

Food producers disagree, saying food inflation is bad enough but could get worse.

This is very revealing. The feds don’t care that your trip to the grocery to feed your family is becoming increasingly more difficult or that people around the world are starving. They care more about cramming our food into our gas tanks.

The federal government’s refusal to relax the quota and mandates on ethanol and the inability to understand the ramifications of those inactions is a culinary no-no of global proportions.

Despite efforts in Beijing to clean up its act, all indications are the Summer Olympic Games will be a culinary catastrophe.

A positive menu move was made a few weeks ago. Even so, if I were attending the Olympic Games that begin this week, I’d be leery of some of the local offerings. And this is coming from a guy who eats anything, isn’t picky, and fully understands the theory that a hungry tourist needs to be adventurous and dine as and where the locals do for an enjoyable, exciting experience.

Here’s something I wouldn’t expect to read in Gourmet Magazine. Remember, that’s Gourmet Magazine.

The headline teasing one of this month’s articles tells me that I can dine “exquisitely” in restaurants in the city hosting the Summer Olympics. I don’t doubt that, especially if I stay away from duck’s feet, steamed crap and burnt lion’s head.

The same headline then does an about face and informs me there’s a better alternative.

Prime rib in Beijing??!!

Hardly.

Gourmet Magazine….did I mention the title? GOURMET Magazine says I need to hit one of the outside vendors some evening and sample the wonder of what GOURMET Magazine calls, “A Banquet of Bugs.”

Writer Stephen Henderson recounts how one vendor in a rather unusual manner enticed him to stop and check out his bill of fare (You’ll find out when I link to the article).

There, Henderson of GOURMET Magazine discovered, “deep-fried centipedes, crickets, grasshoppers, scorpions, silkworms, and starfish. Most of these snacks were neatly arranged kebab-style, on wooden skewers.”

Henderson writes he could feel the little legs tickling his lips as he ate a centipede kebab. He refers to this and other odd dining experiences as broadening the palate and even quotes an “expert” who contends that eating insects, here we go………… will save the planet.

Sorry, Gourmet Magazine. Your arguments just aren’t persuasive enough.

Please pass the crisp Peking duck.

Though it usually comes at the end, I will start with the moral of this story:

Be nice to your waiter.

Culinary no-no #45 dealt with respecting the wait staff at restaurants. We heard from Phoebe Damrosch who has written a book about her experience waiting tables at Thomas Keller’s four-star New York City restaurant, Per Se.

Another book told from the perspective of a waiter is out, only this time, the waiter is out for revenge. Steve Dublanica is the author of, “Waiter Rant: Thanks for the Tip--Confessions of a Cynical Waiter.”

Read an excerpt from his book and also watch a video of his appearance on the Today Show here.  Here's a book review from the Wall Street Journal.

Chances are you’ll have second thoughts the next time you’re thinking about being rude to your server.

When you think of Hawaii, what comes to mind?

Focus, people, focus. This is a food blog.

Of course, you think of...

The pineapple has a long and rich history in our 50^th state.

James Drummond Dole traveled to Hawaii in 1900 with $1,000, degrees in agriculture and business, and a dream of cultivating pineapples. He started growing them north of Oahu and, obviously, became very successful. Dole continues to grow and sell pineapple today and its visitor center on Oahu is a popular tourist destination.

But the pineapple presence in Hawaii isn’t what it once was. In 2006, Del Monte, which began its pineapple business in Hawaii in 1916, announced that it would put an end to its operations because it was no longer economically feasible to grow pineapple in Hawaii since it could be grown cheaper in other parts of the world.

A headline this weekend is enough to rattle a Hawaiian right down to his poi:

“Pineapple could vanish from Hawaii”

Maui Land & Pineapple Co. of Maui is planning huge layoffs and a massive cut in production. Expensive land and labor costs are taking their toll as the unthinkable has occurred: Hawaii having difficulty competing pineapple-wise with Mexico, Costa Rica, Ecuador and other countries.

Many Wisconsinites will be fuming to hear this bit of news. Hawaiian agricultural business would make up the slack in part by growing crops for the production of ethanol.

Pineapple hasn’t vanished completely from the Aloha state, but it’s disappearing at an alarming rate. To see American production of pineapple deteriorate is almost unconscionable. Hawaii without pineapple? Think Milwaukee without a brewery. Sad.

Read more from this weekend’s Honolulu Advertiser.


To read previous Culinary no-no’s, please click CULINARY NO-NO under my TAGS section.

Nowhere in the list is this mentioned:









True, the Golden Arches serves a lot of items high in fat and calories. But is McDonald's to blame for a nation of bloated waistlines?

Two years ago, a study group at the University of Alabama at Birmingham suggested 10 new causes for obesity:

1. Sleep debt. Getting too little sleep can increase body weight. Today's Americans get less shut-eye than ever.

2. Pollution. Hormones control body weight. And many of today’s pollutants affect our hormones.

3. Air conditioning. You have to burn calories if your environment is too hot or too cold for comfort. But more people than ever live and work in temperature-controlled homes and offices.

4. Decreased smoking. Smoking reduces weight. Americans smoke much less than they used to.

5. Medicine. Many different drugs — including contraceptives, steroid hormones, diabetes drugs, some antidepressants, and blood pressure drugs — can cause weight gain. Use of these drugs is on the upswing.

6. Population age, ethnicity. Middle-aged people and Hispanic-Americans tend to be more obese than young European-Americans. Americans are getting older and more Hispanic.

7. Older moms. There's some evidence that the older a woman is when she gives birth, the higher her child's risk of obesity. American women are giving birth at older and older ages.

8. Ancestors' environment. Some influences may go back two generations. Environmental changes that made a grandparent obese may "through a fetally driven positive feedback loop" visit obesity on the grandchildren.

9. Obesity linked to fertility. There's some evidence obese people are more fertile than lean ones. If obesity has a genetic component, the percentage of obese people in the population should increase.

10. Unions of obese spouses. Obese women tend to marry obese men. If there are fewer thin people around — and if obesity has a genetic component — there will be still more obese people in the next generation.

They contend fast food and inactivity can lead to obesity, but are circumstantial factors often given too much attention as opposed to a host of other causes.

Regardless of medical research or common sense, liberal politicians know best. In the city of Los Angeles, the evil fast-food restaurants have been designated as the culprits for a certain section of the city being far too fat.

What’s the solution proposed by members of the city council? In essence, they want to ban “fast food restaurants,” placing a one-year moratorium on the opening of "any establishment which dispenses food for consumption on or off the premises, and which has the following characteristics: a limited menu, items prepared in advance or prepared or heated quickly, no table orders and food served in disposable wrapping or containers."

Approved by a council committee, the moratorium must still pass the full council and the mayor.

Councilman Jose Huizar has problems with the way “fast food restaurant” is defined. For example, what does a “limited menu” mean?

"McDonald's has been increasing the number of items on their menu, so at what point would they exceed that definition?" Huizar said.

The do-gooders in LA haven’t quite figured that out.

Some places, like Subway complained. Subway makes their sandwiches fresh with no heat lamps.

But the intent is clear based on the premise that the restaurants are the villains and that personal responsibility has nothing to do with the problem. So, let’s not build any more Burger King’s. Uhhh, but these political geniuses forget that the moratorium won’t stop those fatties in LA from still going to any of the thousands of fast food joints that are still up and running.

Not only is the idea anti-business, it’s downright foolish. Let’s blame everyone and everything except the individual with questionable personal behavior. It’s that large, evil, corporate giant that insists on mass producing two all-beef patties, lettuce, special sauce, pickles, and cheese on a sesame seed bun. Los Angeles will show ‘em. And then one year from now, when LA is even fatter, what brilliant plan will they come up with next?

Read more in the LA Times.


To read previous Culinary no-no’s, please click CULINARY NO-NO under my TAGS section.

In the broadcast business, it's called a "tease."

They are short promotional announcements designed to entice you to watch an upcoming program.

"WOMEN WHO HATE MEN, ON THE NEXT OPRAH!"


These teases can be extended to :30, packaged into an "update." 

Hmmmm.

I think I've seen that guy before.

Teasing is also done in the print business. This old cover of "Cosmopolitan" is loaded with teases, the "grabbers" that get your attention in the supermarket line.

Just about every publication uses this promotional tool on its cover. On a recent bookstore visit, I picked up this magazine specifically because of a tease on the cover. Note the second of three teases underneath the magazine title:


  

Good meat, slathered in cheese, a toasted bun, some sides like tomato and lettuce. How can you go wrong? Imagine you're having a backyard cookout, you invite lots of friends over, and you're grilling burgers. For a great party, you make sure you've got cheese, onions, pickles, ketchup, mustard, mayo, etc. so your guests have plenty of choices to make a great burger. You don't need pickled beets and pineapple rings and brussels sprouts. Of course not. Classic burgers with classic combinations.

But is that really good enough?

Not if you ask chef Nancy Silverton, the co-founder of Campanile restaurant and La Brea Bakery in Los Angeles. When you find out how she throws a burger cookout, you're going to feel mighty inadequate.

The LA Times tagged along at one of Silverton’s soirees to carefully observe how an expert prepares what she considers the perfect burger.

Silverton lights her barbecue pit at 8:00 a.m. with a fire made from almond wood (Kingsford doesn’t make that stuff, do they?). When her guests arrive in the middle of the day, the toppings are ready and buns are sliced.

The bun. No fancy, schmancy 12-grain deal. Pita bread? Are you crazy? Just the time-honored, soft variety.

The key is the ratio of bun to meat. It has to be 50-50 so you can avoid…..


 


The toppings must be traditional…no foie-gras!

Ketchup is good. But is that good enough?

No, Silverton insists on Heinz ketchup.

Mayo, you’ve got to have mayo, but is having mayo good enough?

Best Foods Mayo if you’re in the western part of the country, Hellman’s in our neck of the woods.

Ok, you’ve got the Hellman’s. Is that good enough?

Nope.

Silverton likes to serve the mayo three ways: plain, mixed up with chiles and a third with garlic and tapenade.

Mustard? Are you kidding me? Gotta have mustard….Dijon mustard. Is that good enough?

Well……no.

You must have two types of Dijon, plain and whole grain.

Lettuce…..there must be lettuce. Will any lettuce do?

Umm, no.

It must be iceberg, one crisp leaf per person.

Onions. God, I love onions on a burger. Silverton advises one full slice of red onion per person.

Ok, I can handle that. Red onions. Is that good enough? One slice of red onion per person?

You’ve detected a pattern here, haven’t you..

NO, that’s not good enough silly! You have to salt and pepper the onions.

Make sure there’s the Mezzetta brand of Tuscan Pepperoncini as well.

Did we forget anything?

Yeh, we did.

Tomatoes. Brandywines, Russians, Beefsteak.

Silverton includes avocados with her toppings, recommending they be sliced thickly.

Bacon. Oh, yes! Applewood-smoked and not crispy. Is that good enough? I don’t let the bacon get crispy. Check.

No. Two pieces of bacon per guest (because people snitch).

If you’re not yelling at the computer screen by now, you should be.

CHEESE, WE MUST HAVE CHEESE!

I’ll just serve good ol’ American and that’ll be okay, right?

Negative!

Three cheeses if you pleases: blue, cheddar and Gruyere.

Any brand?

No.

Point Reyes blue, Grafton cheddar and cave-aged Gruyere.

OK, you’ve hunted and searched for all three. Is that good enough, chef Silverton?

No.

Crumble the blue. Ditto for the cheddar. Sprinkle the crumbles and delight as they ooze and melt.

Do you crumble the Gruyere, too?

Are you from Wisconsin or not?

No you don’t crumble the Gruyere, you fool! You serve that in slices or risk being a total failure.

The meat. Very important.

Get up early. Go to the butcher the day of the cookout.

Order whole prime chuck ground with 13% sirloin fat added by weight.

Back home, the patties formed will be 8 ounces each, two inches thick.

Beatrice de Gea / Los Angeles Times
FIRE IT UP: Silverton tops patties, made of beef with at least 20% to 28% fat, with crumbled chunks of blue cheese, left, and cheddar. "With lean meat," she says, "the burgers don't hold together."


Regular salt?

No way.

Kosher salt.

The result?



Béatrice de Géa / Los Angeles Times
TOP THIS: The hamburger according to Silverton stars fat-enriched, coarse-ground prime chuck that's seasoned generously and handled gently.


Feeling inadequate?

Silverton does throw a helluva party.

But you'll probably never have her over anyway.

It's easy and wrong to overdo it and be too creative with a burger. Silverton, one could argue, also overdoes it. But she overdoes it in so many really goooooooooood ways.

The perfect burger?

What's been the recurring theme here?

No.

There is no such creation as the perfect burger.

But Silverton comes pretty darn close.


To read previous Culinary no-no’s, please click CULINARY NO-NO under my TAGS section. 
 

Culinary no-no?

On Thursday?

What’s goin’ on, Fischer?

I’ll tell ya what’s goin’ on.

News updates wait for no weekend.

Culinary no-no #54 …….of course you remember it like it was yesterday, but it really was in May…..focused on a new law in New York City that would begin in July whereby certain restaurants must post the number of calories for each item on their menu boards or face fines beginning. Food police in the form of pencil-pushing inspectors are going to burst into restaurants, clipboards and cameras in hand, handing out citations. These government hacks will not be smiling and will demonstrate quite clearly that they’ve never heard of Emily Post or Dale Carnegie.

Well guess what?

It’s July!

The law is now in effect.

How are hard-nosed New Yorkers reacting?

Let’s find out.

All of the ingredients, once molded and folded together are placed in a loafpan and baked.

Here’s what the finished Illinois version looks like....

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Nutraloaf, a product from the cafeteria of the Chittenden Regional Correctional Facility, is presented by an inmate in South Burlington, Vermont. Nutraloaf is made of whole wheat bread, non-dairy cheese, raw carrots, spinach, seedless raisins, beans, vegetable oil, tomato paste, powdered milk and dehydrated potato flakes. (Photo Credit: Associated Press/Andy Duback)

LeMaire’s 1992 lawsuit isn’t the first or the last to be filed. Inmates have been complaining since the late 70’s about Nutraloaf, and a case involving Vermont prisoners is the most recent to go to court. Oral arguments were heard in March and a decision is expected by the end of the year.

Watch this video about the Vermont case.

Neil Cavuto of FOX News got this man-on the street......well, actually, it's more like "woman on the street" reaction to Nutraloaf.

And finally, one lawyer serves up Nutraloaf........ at a dinner party. This article also contains more on the legal issues involved.

In and of itself, Nutraloaf is at the top of the list of Culinary no-no's. But when served to unruly, violent prisoners, I have no problem.

To read previous Culinary no-no’s, please click CULINARY NO-NO under my TAGS section.

(SPECIAL NOTE: The inclusion of bikini-clad women in this week's edition was entirely unintentional. It just worked out that way)